Why Doesn’t My Teen Learn in the Classroom?

“We teachers – perhaps all human beings – are in the grip of an astonishing delusion.”

Our astonishing delusion about education.

“We think that we can take a picture, a structure, a working model of something, constructed in our minds out of long experience and familiarity, and by turning that model into a string of words, transplant it whole into the mind of someone else.”

Trying to implant our knowledge in the brain of another.

“Perhaps once in a thousand times, when the explanation is extraordinary good, and the listener extraordinarily experienced and skillful at turning word strings into non-verbal reality, and when the explainer and listener share in common many of the experiences being talked about, the process may work, and some real meaning may be communicated.”

It’s easier to share knowledge when you’re in close relationship with a lot of non-verbal sharing.

“Most of the time, explaining does not increase understanding, and may even lessen it.”

– John Holt, (1923-1985) American Educator,  in How Children Learn

The more impersonal and disconnected the relationship, the harder it is to share knowledge.

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Open Doors teens at the beach — because sharing real life experiences leads to sharing real life knowledge. (And it’s fun!)

This post is part of our “Your Life – Your Learning!” series, designed to help the Grand Rapids community rethink teen learning, and brought to you with support from the Wege Foundation.  If your teen isn’t learning in the classroom, come find out more at our Open House on Monday, October 13 at 12 noon.

WGVU Morning Show with Shelley Irwin

Check out our fun interview with Shelley Irwin of the WGVU Morning Show.  You’ll hear about Rebecca’s journey and the founding of Open Doors.  It was such a pleasure to talk to Shelley — she’s always a joy.

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Left to right: Amy Carpenter Leugs (Outreach Director), Shelley Irwin (WGVU Morning Host), Rebecca Kirk (Director and Founder of Open Doors Center for Self-Directed Teens)

Who Has the Power in Your Teen’s Learning?

by Jacob Sabourin

Our Open Doors Intern, Jacob Sabourin, has worked closely with struggling students at Aquinas College here in Grand Rapids.  He is a Political Science major with a keen interest in the politics of power. Here he explores the issues of power as they relate to teens and learning.

When I was in my junior year of high school, my chemistry teacher, Mr. Stewart, asked me to come forward in front of the class. As my classmates looked on, he grabbed me by my tie (which was fairly low-hanging, admittedly), and jerked it violently up into my throat, delivering a bruising blow and choking me. “I’ve been wanting to do that all day,” he then said triumphantly, to no one in particular.

Teachers have an enormous amount of power over students. And sometimes, teachers have tempers.

None of my classmates reported the incident, and neither did I for many months. We were used to deferring to the authority of those in power over us.

But Mr. Stewart held a grudge against me because on an occasion the week before, I had not been properly deferential to his authority within the classroom. I had finished a test early and excused myself to the restroom. I had looked at him but had failed to execute the “necessary hand wave,” which, unknown to me, was a requirement to use the restroom, according to the unwritten law of the land. He told me I had to serve a week of detention under his supervision, which I refused to do, and so he failed me for the semester. The next semester, I arranged a meeting with the principal, showed him my assignments, and proved to him I had, in fact, passed the class according to public school requirements. The school district began investigating the many complaints levied against Mr. Stewart, and apparently some sort of reprimand was given.

But Mr. Stewart still teaches chemistry at my high school. I still had to serve a week of detention scrubbing floors (under the principal’s supervision, however). And even though I had incontrovertible proof, it took me months to convince my parents that my behavior was, for the most part, righteous, and not the mark of a stereotypically rebellious teenager without a cause. And only once my parents got involved did anyone in the school administration take my complaints seriously.

I know I wasn’t alone in feeling disempowered in high school. The school system, by definition, is a hierarchical institution in which administrators have the most power. Then teachers. Then parents. Then, finally, students. Of course, most of those adults in power are not entirely as corrupt as Mr. Stewart. But they almost certainly have the ability to be.

Students can feel powerless in school.

In light of this fact, it’s imperative for teenagers to understand what they do have power over. Eating right and exercising empowers their bodies. Learning a skill like a musical instrument or a new languages or a useful craft can empower a teen through practical knowledge, which will be recognized by others who may defer to her out of respect. Standing up to a bully empowers a teen to regain sovereignty over his social standing. And when a teen understands his rights and responsibilities as a citizen, he can be sure he is not a victim of the abuses of others.

Like all human beings, teenagers encounter issues involving power dynamics every day. But many teens aren’t aware of who has power over them, why that is, and what they can do to increase their own power over themselves. I wasn’t aware of these dynamics when I was in high school. I didn’t know how to have a reasonable conversation with adults without resorting out of desperation to overused and empty tropes like “this is a free country and I can do what I want.” When a teen says things like this, he sounds simple-minded and needlessly rebellious to any casually-observing adult . Often, because of teens’ limited understanding of the world around them, they have difficulty communicating a deeply entrenched sense of powerlessness, even to their parents.

Parents are prone to mistaking these communicative difficulties for behavioral problems. Perhaps a student says she “doesn’t see the point” of repeated worksheet assignments for her English class in which she answers trivial questions regarding the assigned novel (say, The Great Gatsby), which include reciting dates on which events in the book occurred, or the color of the sweater of a minor character. Suppose she fails these assignments repeatedly, and as such, is failing the class.

But she reads Gatsby and understands it. Maybe she admires a boy across the street, and can relate to the character Gatsby’s feelings of jealousy and lost love as he gazes across the bay to the green light emanating from Daisy’s house.

A teen’s true intelligence isn’t always recognized by worksheets and tests.

 In this situation, a parent or teacher might force a more rigorous routine of study on this student after diagnosing her as lazy or uncommitted to her academic success. Or worse, the issue could be ignored and she could flunk out of high school.

But the real issue in this scenario is that her academic needs and talents are not addressed by these assignments. She doesn’t know she can go to her teacher and discuss these personal reflections; the unwritten rules of school tell her that the teacher’s current assignments are the only possible assessment of her learning. She feels unintelligent or worthless in class, and she’s turned off to reading. She probably doesn’t even know her reflections have academic validity. But they do!

If she did have that conversation, she might be directed to other books that might interest her, leading to more discussions.  Those discussions might even change the way assignments and grading are handled in that class.

Instead, she finds school to be an oppressive environment, in which her natural ability to think critically (a capacity all humans have) is stifled.  The most she can think to say, once again, is that she “doesn’t see the point” of her assignments. She might even say “reading is stupid,” or “I hate school,” or a number of discouraging statements, all stemming from an inability to communicate her powerlessness.

I joined Open Doors because I know there are teens out there who feel oppressed. They know what is best for themselves but have difficulty communicating how exactly their power is being taken from them. As a result don’t know how to empower themselves. In my short time here, I’ve seen flashes of the opportunity for youth empowerment I’d always hoped for.

This post is part of our “Your Life – Your Learning!” series, designed to help the Grand Rapids community rethink teen learning, and brought to you with support from the Wege Foundation.

Help! My Teen Doesn’t Want to Go Back To School!

It’s August — the sun is setting a bit earlier every night, and the back-to-school ads have returned with their pictures of cool kids in great outfits hanging out near lockers and talking with friends.

Back-to-school ads are in full swing now.

But what about the teen who is dreading going back to school?  As one mother writes:

I am a single mother of two and my teenage son will not go to school! He is on truancy probation with the county, and he still won’t go. … He’s very smart, respectful, helps around the house and has great grades and does the homework. Is there something he or I can do so he can drop out (not that I want that for my son) but I just don’t know what else to do. He has a job and is on his school’s football team but he just wants to get his driver’s license and work. He doesn’t want to go to school anymore.

A teen dreading what’s next.

When confronted by a question like this, some experts recommend going to a therapist who specializes in school phobias.  Some recommend a comprehensive plan of setting solutions and what they call “positive incentives”  — giving the child a few more minutes of TV time or friend time for every step they take toward attending school more positively.  Most of these experts want to try to get to the root of the issue and address it, but do they go far enough in finding the root?

For instance, at a site called Empowering Parents (not Empowering Kids or Empowering Families, we notice), we read that most kids who refuse to go to school fall into one or more of these categories:

1.  Kids who are being bullied or those who are having trouble getting along with  peers, either for the short term or the long term

2.  Kids who are struggling academically and for whom school has become a very negative experience

3.  Kids who have problems with authority and following the rules

4.  Kids who are experiencing some anxiety—separation anxiety, or worry about tests, what’s happening at home, or whether or not they’ll be picked up that day, etc.

The expert then writes:

the key …  includes teaching your child how to be a better problem-solver with a healthier outlook on their responsibilities.

These reasons and the solution look pretty good on first view.  But looked at more closely, we can see that they don’t go very deeply.

1.  For instance, is the bullying problem making the child feel unsafe?  Safety is a basic human need — all growth and learning depend on feeling safe enough to do so.  Yet most commonly, teens do not reach out to adults for help with bullying, and for good reasons — having an adult step in can make the bullying worse.  What’s needed is true communication and honesty among all parties — a process that takes far more time and emotional investment than most school staff can provide.

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Real communication with teens and adults at Open Doors — the best antidote to bullying.

2.  “Struggling academically” could mean all sorts of things, but most likely, the teen is starting to feel dumb and dis-empowered.  Consider that up to 75% of all teens have a dominant learning style that is not a good match with the traditional classroom.  Most teens need more hands-on opportunities and more involvement with the things they really care about.  It’s no wonder that some teens just can’t continue to force themselves into a mold that doesn’t fit.

3.  “Kids who have problems with authority” is also a very vague reason.  We want teens to grow into innovative and self-motivating adults, yet we also want them to submit to authority?  It’s very confusing for a teen.

In fact, submitting to authority is very different than developing a partnership with a mentor who accepts who the teen really is.  Teens do need mentoring on how to take their interests and develop them into skills that will help them enter the adult world.  Leaving the traditional classroom can actually open up an opportunity to enter a mentor relationship with real-world value.

4.  And “kids who are experiencing anxiety” usually have underlying reasons for that anxiety.  They may need more time for self-exploration to find out how to face their fears and get the support they need as they navigate the bigger world.  They may need a chance to succeed in the real world, at a job or a project, to build their confidence.

Wild Edibles pretty table

Succeeding at this Wild Edible project — which involved foraging and preparing these foods for a feast at Open Doors — was certainly a confidence-builder for the teens involved. And it was just plain fun!

The expert’s final advice — to have the teen learn better problem-solving — discounts the fact that the structure of the traditional classroom, with its emphasis on testing and grades, simply does not have the flexibility to allow the kind of problem-solving that some teens need.

At Open Doors, we understand the expert’s concern that the teen must get an education, but we know that an education does not necessarily equal a traditional classroom.

It is possible for a teen to opt out of that classroom and to get a real and personalized education in the real world.  It’s possible for that teen to have a meaningful mentoring relationship as she learns.  And it’s possible for that teen to learn how to communicate honestly, assertively, and peacefully with others of all ages.  It happens every day here at Open Doors, and it can happen for a teen you know.

This post is part of our “Your Life – Your Learning!” series, designed to help the Grand Rapids community rethink teen learning, and brought to you with support from theWege Foundation.

Going Natural in Education

Lara Smothers on Going Natural —

A natural education.  It’s an “alternative” that existed before schools did, and it’s still a valid educational option, yet we so rarely remember that humans are made to learn and grow and explore, with or without school.  Contact us and find out more.

“I Used to Worry All the Time”

by Amy Carpenter Leugs

Recently, as I was working on my computer on the couch in the Gathering Room at Open Doors, one of our members came in and sat with me as she ate her lunch.  Cecilia had just come back from studying with a naturopath, Angie, with Continuum Healing in our building.   As we sat and chatted, she shared with me what she’s been doing since she left high school a few months ago.  Here are some snippets from our conversation.

Amy:  Last time we talked, you were looking for a long-term research project.  How is that going?

Cecilia:  I found one!  Fifteen years ago, my Grandma had a rare type of cancer in her throat, and due to the surgery to remove it, half of her tongue is paralyzed now.  We’ve contacted her surgeon and we’ll have a chance to refer to her records and see exactly what has been damaged and what the treatment was.  With so many medical advances over the last 15 years, plus the knowledge available from a naturopath like Angie, I want to see if anything can be done to help her.  There are other projects I want to do,  too, but this one is a good place to start.  Maybe there’s nothing we can do, but on the other hand, I might actually help someone.

Cecilia with heart diagram

Amy:  That’s great.  And you’ve found some other interesting projects, haven’t you?

Cecilia:  Yep.  This summer I’m going to do a six-week surgical internship with the horse veterinarian that I shadow, so I’ll learn a lot there.  I’ll also be going to the Grand Tetons with David Buth from Summer Journeys — it’s called a leadership adventure and we’ll be horsepacking in.

Amy:  What have you learned about your own learning style since you’ve been here at Open Doors?  I remember when you first started, you thought you wanted to do a dissection every week.  But then you realized you needed some time to diagram and write things out, to process it, right?  What else?

Cecilia:  I also need to keep searching out mentors in the fields I’m interested in — I really like to learn with people, and especially with people doing their jobs.  I want to do more internships.  So that will be a challenge for next year, to find people in the fields I’m interested in.  Over the last few months I’ve learned what works for me, and I can use that next year.

Amy:  Now that you’ve been out of high school for a few months, are you glad that you left?

Cecilia:  I am pretty glad.  The only thing I miss — I loved being with a large group of kids my age.  So next year I’m going to take yoga and choir at my high school, and have lunch period there as well.

Amy:  That’s true.  We do have more teens here on Tuesdays and Thursdays, but you have different interests and so you’ve been here on Monday and Fridays, when we just have a couple members here at a time.

Cecilia:  And even now I still get to see my friends after school and on weekends.  In fact, I get to enjoy my time with them even more, because I’m not stressed out about my own homework.

That’s the weird thing — sometimes I help my friends with their homework, and I realize that it’s mostly just busy work.  I can figure it out without having been in the class. But my friends are so worried about grades and GPA and getting into college.

I used to worry all the time, too.  Even though I didn’t believe in the system — I didn’t believe that good grades meant you were really learning — I still wanted to get good grades and go to college.  And now I’m just out here, learning things and doing things.  I’m doing dissections, I’m seeing how a naturopath works, I’m helping a vet.  The other day a group of teens and I did biology in the Grand River with David Buth — we identified specimens we found in the water, and checked for mutations due to pollution.

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Amy:  That sounds fun.  And I agree — grades don’t reflect much about learning, though they might show how good a student is at memorizing.

Cecilia:  Yes!  I used to just cram everything in my head for a test, and then forget it all afterward, so I could cram the new stuff in.  Now I don’t forget as much — I keep building one thing on another.

Amy:  Right — I notice that you keep asking questions, and those questions keep leading you to new places.

***

Soon our conversation drifted onto other things.  Our talk about college placement tests led Cecilia to ask questions about my own college experience.  I explained that though I loved college and learning, I also found it quite intellectual, when I often wanted to seek out the more emotional and relational side of life.  When Cecilia asked if I ever considered going back for a higher degree than my Bachelor’s, I reflected that I had always found ways to meet those learning needs outside of college — whether through unschooling my own three boys, writing children’s books or other pieces, or working with a Jungian community in Three Rivers.  Life has always presented me with an integrated way to “live the questions,” to use Wendell Berry’s phrase.

It is always such a pleasure to converse and reflect with our teens — they are each so different and each finding their way, and I know I speak for all our staff and volunteers when I say that witnessing it all is a huge honor.

Amy Carpenter Leugs is the Outreach Director at Open Doors Center for Self-Directed Teens.  A former teacher, Amy unschools her three boys, reads and writes widely, plays with people of all ages, and speaks about life learning every chance she gets.

High School Dropouts: Including Teens In the Conversation

As the May graduation frenzy winds down, maybe it’s time to think about those teens who never make a traditional high school graduation.

If a teen is empowered, often with help from the adults in her life, leaving high school can mean taking back her education and becoming a self-directed learner.

But for too many teens — nearly a million every year, nationwide — leaving high school means all the hopelessness of dropping out — no job, no college, no creativity, no travel, and an increased risk of poverty, crime, and victimization.

How can we turn this around?  The first step is to ask the teens themselves.  That’s what this video is about.

We’ll say it again:  ask the teens themselves.   They’ll tell you how school isn’t working for them in its current form, if you’ll listen.  When interviewed, up to 40% of teens said they feel unmotivated at school, and up to 75% of teens named school as a source of considerable strain in their lives.  Which is interesting, given that 75% of all school students have a learning style (such as being a hands-on learner or a social learner) that isn’t addressed by the traditional classroom model of lecture, memorization, reading, and writing.

At Open Doors, our teens have said that their solution is to pursue real-world, self-directed learning.   Our teens are not “dropouts,” though they are not in traditional school — they are working, interning, volunteering, creating, writing, researching, and always, always learning.

We look forward to hearing what other teens, like those in this video, have to say.  We hope that more solutions for self-directed learning — the kind of learning that provides real meaning and growth — spring forth from the conversation.  Come to an event to find out more.

Member Feature: Evolving My Dream

By Adena Koslek   

Tara self-portrait in shadows

Tara Burns: Self-Portrait in Shadows

In this interview, Tara Burns sat with me and shared her experience since she opted out of her old high school and jumped into the self-directed approach of the Open Doors Center for Self-Directed Learning. Tara is a teen who went on a quest in the summer of 2013 to find out who she could become without the distractions of traditional school, something her experience told her “didn’t quite fit with what she was feeling within.” It was so pleasing to hear of her empowering experience at Open Doors. Tara went from having low attendance and low grades in her traditional school setting to feeling pangs of guilt if she ever has to miss a single class at Open Doors.

The insight gained by her self-directed studies has helped Tara discover what had long been her inner dream: to become an Art Therapist. Tara’s confidence has increased now that she has a specific direction in life: not only does it feel great, but she is pleased that the outcome is going to benefit others.  Within six months of being at Open Doors, Tara is able to take significant steps to begin actualizing her desired future. With assistance from Rebecca Kirk, the Director of Open Doors, she’s been developing a Personal Learning Plan which includes setting up interviews and internship possibilities to help her learn and grow in the direction of her dream.

Here’s the interview:

Adena: Who do you feel you were when you began at Open Doors?

Tara: I didn’t know. But, I was excited. It felt like new things and opportunities in life were happening. High School was feeling really “out of reach” for me after freshman year. It felt impossible. I tried Online Schooling but that wasn’t fun.

Adena: What was the biggest need that was not being met in your traditional school setting?

Tara: It felt like subjects were being pushed. Like, we would start something I was interested in and then we would change the topic in a couple days and begin talking about things I wasn’t really interested in. I really wanted to keep studying the subject I was interested in more deeply.

Adena: What are some of the classes you are taking now and your opinions of them?

Tara: I am learning a lot in all my classes. I know we don’t do grades here, but (giggle) I would give me an A in every one of them. (We both laughed.) I like the U.S. History Class because I am really drawn to learning about Civil Rights and we are really staying focused on that because that’s what the class members want. Personal Finance is interesting because when I took the little test on “what I knew” before the class started it was interesting to see what the answers to things like ‘saving’, ‘taking care of yourself’ and ‘paying bills’ really were. And I love my Film Studies class. I am also learning some really neat things in a class called Stalking The Wild Asparagus which teaches about wild edibles. I also take a Non-Violent Communication class with many of the adult members, and a Feeling and Critical Thinking class; both of which are very helpful when considering the direction I want to continue to take with Art Therapy.

Adena: Is Open Doors satisfying you as your needs grow and evolve?

Tara: Yes. I feel more freedom creatively and I like knowing where I take my education is my responsibility.

Adena: In order to opt out of traditional school and take the challenge to become Self-Directed here at Open Doors, a member must become homeschooled under the law. When your family first learned of this, how did they feel?

Tara: Excited for something new. My mom was very skeptical. It wasn’t until after our first meeting with Rebecca that she really began to feel more settled. It’s not what people might think.

Adena: What did you want to do with your life when you came to Open Doors and has that changed?

Tara: I couldn’t really say when I came here, but I knew I felt “Art Therapy.” I could sorta feeeel it inside me as an idea. Not really a concrete reality. It wasn’t until Open Doors members helped me learn how to research those things that I learned it was a real job! Art in my old high school was mostly me sitting with a group of kids who really didn’t care about art. It was a lot of talk about drugs and whatever their homework was for another class, but never art the way I wanted to learn about it. I don’t even think the art teacher knew my name. I’m pretty sure she called me by a completely different name during conferences.


After the interview, Tara got back to her projects and I to mine. At Open Doors we are pleased about the versatility that the timeless clock offers us and the great pleasure it brings to work with teens who simply need some respect and the opportunity to learn in their own unique way.

Adena Koslek is an Instructor and Teen Coach, as well as a founding member of the Leadership Team of Open Doors.

 

 

Community Collaboration with Goodwill Industries

Real learning in the real world is such an important principle at Open Doors.  That’s why we’re happy to share a story of our collaboration with Goodwill Industries, a non-profit with significant positive influence in our community.

As described in Learning with Slender Man, our Critical Thinking and Feeling class is working on a short scary film.  They went to Goodwill to pick out costumes and props for the movie.  When we called ahead about our trip, the staff was happy to accommodate us and make room for our photographer, Lori, to take pictures.

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Thank you to Goodwill Industries and Moments by Lori Ann.

The class was careful to respect other customers and their privacy.  They were delighted to find low-prices on costumes and other fun items.  The world is our classroom, a place where budgeting, creating, and cooperative problem-solving all happen naturally — thank you to Goodwill Industries for being a part of that.

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Working together!

(Note:  If you are concerned about the May 30 stabbing in Wisconsin and its relevance to Slender Man, please see our statement here.  Our thoughts are with all the families and communities involved, and we hope for a complete and speedy recovery for the victim.)

A Self-Directed Teen Speaks

A member of the Compass Centre for Self-Directed Learning in Ontario, Willow shares her story.  “I looked from the outside like I was thriving in school,” she says.  In actuality, “I had succumbed to the anxiety of school work, social pressures, and the constant feeling that I was only worth the grades I received.”

Even though she was unhappy, it was difficult for Willow to leave the established norm of traditional school.  We know it can be difficult for our teens and families, too.  Willow’s words of advice to those teens who are thinking about leaving school:

“You may feel lost and alone, but this life you are considering will be so much more meaningful to you, because it will be your own life, and in the end, that’s all that counts.”